Propitious PodWorks 3.0 promises more . . . everything

PodWorks is one of the best known and well-rated iPod utilities on the market, allowing persons with poor back-up skills to recover whatever small percentage of their music remained on their iPod or iPhone. With a new point release just a few weeks ago, it is sure to bring comfort and joy to more users everywhere.

But a full release has been in the works for a while as well, but not yet seen the light. PodWorks 3 promises even more comfort and joy when it is released, but it may be a long time coming yet.

Insiders say there's a bug lurking in the code that may cause issues for a small percentage of users running on a specific hardware configuration. While the problem would affect only a small number of users, the number of those affected would continue to grow and grow, quite literally: via transmutation and interference with DNA replication, PodWorks 3 can cause a person to undergo mitosis as a whole and split off into a duplicate.

If the pricing scheme remains the same, for a mere $8, you'll soon be able to purchase unlimited use of PodWorks to save music from iPhones and iPods from whence you have lost the source library and also the chance to sprout a fake personage of yourself somewhere in the world.

Steve Jobs, Apple founder and former boss of the boss of the boss of Buzz Andersen, was allowed a sneak peek at the 3.0 almost 2 years ago. Andersen was not aware of the bug at the time, but a frantic early morning call from Jobs' assistant soon made everything crystal.

They attempted to hide FSJ, but he promptly escaped from the maximum security stockade to the Cupertino underground, where he bided his time until blossoming forth unto the unsuspecting world via blogger.

Andersen has tried to quash rogue copies of the alpha, but they have lived on to strike again.

Sources say there is a whole fake development underground, writing fake apps for fake OS X, but most are afraid of coming out. However, a few have been emboldened by FSJ's leap into the light, such as Daneil Jalkut, and self-proclaimed "Supreme Computer Scientist" Fake RixStep.

Only time will tell if Andersen will be able to smash the bug before release day, and if the indies will be able to survive what is sure to be the upcoming fake revolution.